Respecting ones wife while calling her and giving her nick name rather than saying “tu” ,”teri” etc.
1. When Prophet Musa, peace be upon him, was traveling with his wife, he addressed her using the plural form of address, saying:
آپ ذرا ادھر ہی رکیں
You (please) stay here for a while.” (Surah Al-Qasas: 29)
Here we call our wives with “tu” “teri” etc. It’s rare if someone says “aap” specifically if someone is alone with her.
According to some scholars, Musa (peace be upon him) used the plural form out of respect and honor for his wife. (*Daf‘ Iham al-Idtirab* by Ash-Shanqiti, p. 247) via Hafiz Muhammad Tahir
2. Calling her with sweet nicknames.
Aisha (may Allah be pleased with her) said:
“The Abyssinians entered the mosque while performing (their traditional play). The Prophet (peace be upon him) said to me, ‘O Humayra (a loving nickname for Aisha), would you like to watch them?’ I replied, ‘Yes.’ So he stood by the door, and I went to him, placing my chin on his shoulder and resting my face against his cheek.
– Al-Nasa’i in *Al-Sunan al-Kubra* (8/181)
– Al-Tahawi in *Sharh Mushkil al-Athar* (1/268)
– Ibn al-Qattan authenticated it in *Ahkam al-Nazar* (360)
– Al-Albani in *Al-Silsila al-Sahiha* (7/818)
– Shu’ayb al-Arna’ut in *Takhrij Sharh Mushkil al-Athar* (292)
3. Bulbul the wife of Allama Ibn Mubrad Hanbali (d 909 h).
He loved her so much that he wrote a book
“لقط السنبل في أخبار البلبل” in which he wrote about beautiful days he spent with his wife.
4. The wife of Imam Ahmad.
The husband and Wife who never disagreed for 20 years on even one word.
Ibn Abi Yala said:
زوجة إمامنا أحمد وأم ابنه صالح كان أحمد يثني عليها وسمعت منه أشياء وماتت في حياته.
قال زهير بن صالح بن أحمد تزوج جدي أم أبي عباسة بنت الفضل وهي من العرب من الربض ولم يولد له منها غير أبي ثم توفيت وقال أحمد أقامت أم صالح معي عشرين سنة فما اختلفت أنا وهي في كلمة.
She was the wife of our Imam Ahmad and mother of his son Saaleh, Ahmad Praised her.. She died in his life…
Ahmad said: Umm Saleh stood with me for twenty years, and we do not DISAGREE ON EVEN ONE WORD. [Tabqaat al Hanabilah (1/427), See also Tareekh Baghda3. Ibn Hajr al Asqalani loved his wife Layla so much that when he went far from home, He said:
رحلت وخلفت الحبيب بداره … برغمي ولم أجنح إلى غيره ميلاً
أشاغل نفسي بالحديث تعللا … نهاري وفي ليلي أحن إلى ليلي
I departed and left my beloved behind in the house …and, I didn’t incline towards anyone besides liking her.
I busy myself in hadith and explaining it day and night, longing for the night (Layla).
This is narrated by his student al Sakhawi in الضوء اللام2. Love story of the great scholar and historian Taqi al din Miqrizi (766 h to 845 h) and his wife Safra bint Umar Umm Muhammad (770 h to 790 h).
He wrote a biography of his wife who died at the age of 20 only. He was 24 years of age at the time when she died and lived 55 years after her death.
He said
:واتفق أني كنت أكثر من الاستغفار لها بعد موتها فأريتها في بعض الليالي وقد دخلت علي بهيئتها التي كفنتها بها، فقلت لها: وقد تذكرت أنها ميتة: يا أم محمد: الذي أرسله إليك يصل ؟ أعني استغفاري. فقالت: نعم سيدي، في كل يوم تصل هديتك إلي، ثم بكت وقالت، قد علمت يا سيدي أني عاجزة عن مكافاتك. فقلت لها: لا عليك عما قليل نلتقي.
وكانت غفر الله لها مع صغر سنها من خير نساء زمانها عفة وصيانة وديانة وثقة وأمانة ورزانة ما عُوضت بعدها مثلها .
أبـكـي فـراقهم عيني فأرّقها إن الـتـفـرق للأحباب بكاء
ما زال يعدو عليهم ريب دهرهم حـتى تفانواوريب الدهر عدّاءُ
جمعنا الله بها في جنته وعمنا بعفوه ومغفرته.
I used to pray for her forgiveness frequently. Once I saw her in a dream.. I asked, O Umm Muhammad, whatever I send to you i.e. supplications for your forgiveness do you get that?
She replied: Yes MY Sayyid I get those gifts daily. Then she cried and said do you know my sayyid? I can’t repay your gifts…
May Allah forgive her even though she was young, she was best of the women of our time in chastity, wisdom, Diyanah, trustworthiness, Amanah… May Allah unite us in jannah..
[Durar ]1. Shuraih al Qadhi Praising his wife Zainab from Banu Tamim.
It is attributed to Shuraih al Qadhi |(The great student of Sahaba) that he said about his wife Zainab:
فشلت يميني حين أضرب زينبا وزينب شمس والنساء كواكب
إذا طلعت لم تبق منهن كوكبا
May My right hand be Paralyzed if I beat her.
Zainab is like a sun and other women are like star, when the sun rises the stars do not shine.
[Siyar A’laam an-Nubala under the biography of Shuraih al Qadhi]ood 2/99 no. 488]ع 5/458d 14/438]